What do you feel about death? Do you fear it? Do you think if you don’t plan for it, it won’t happen? Having a good death, is about planning for it, not avoiding it
Being able to say your goodbyes, calm and soothe the patient for a respectful death.
1. Why is it important to talk about this tabu topic
There is less stress at the end, whenever it comes for each person.. There is a investment to hear what each other believes and needs to be heard. Having a good death, meaning you’ve spoken to people of whom you care about, to pertain what you want to or wish for at the end of your life. True regret will only come, if you have not taken action or spoken your wishes.
2. The importance of talking about it with your family members,
The dying process is not a solo venture, you are surrounded by hospice, family, friends, doctors, nurses perhaps even an end of life Doula and palliative care. Everyone is invested in helping you to have a smooth transition. When we arrive as a baby, we are celebrated.. when we go, we are celebrated with those who help us, by packing a bag getting ready for take off.-
3. Leave nothing unsaid
Family members and your health team, are more willing to have the more intimate and authentic conversations that really should occur between family members and their dying loved ones at the end of life, creating a sense of closure and completion of their relationships
Survey of who often has discussions vs those that don’t
Results: Participants’ mean age was 70 (range: 58-87); three-fourths were female (n = 27). 20 were white, non-Hispanic; 10 were African American; and 6 were Hispanic. I read this as white people are less likely to talk about it.
Four themes emerged from the data,
(1) being proactive or passive/reactive;
(2) perceiving discussion of death as normal or abnormal;
(3) response to family resistance/disconnection; and
(4) knowledge acquired.
(5) the role of healthcare providers in family EOL care discussions, resulted from facilitators’ questions., led to identification of a central category, decision-making, for a Good LIfe
Read more https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/
In order to help us learn different perspectives about death, the planning or figuring out our own exit strategy.. Starting on January 6, 2022, I’m hosting a conversation cafe.. topics more the the idea of talk about death, you can share your own experiences and learn from other people. It’s on a weekly basis
When: Jan 6, 2022 09:00 AM Pacific Time (US and Canada)
Register in advance for this meeting, every week.
After registering, you will receive a confirmation email containing information about joining the meeting. Look forward having you join in on the Death Cafe.. bring your coffee/tea.. Let’s talk about your fears of death…What do you feel about death?
Keywords: communication, family, end of life, death and dying, palliative care, healthcare, transitioning
I’ve just started to write about EOL and similar topics, as most of the people I know don’t want to talk about this tabu conversation, yet if you have your own plan or exit strategy you will be ready and peaceful death.
During my training as an EOL Doula, I’ve learned so much.. if you enjoyed this article please share it and subscribe to my newsletter.
Have yourself a Happy Holiday.. Free resources
Until next time!