Self-confidence is believing in oneself, if you don’t, we’ll start to criticize ourselves about the decisions we made or ones we didn’t make. Do you feel worthy?
The best way to build self-confidence is to fall in love with your life. It depends upon your self talk, if you criticize yourself you are not falling in love.
I remember, I took a class on how to help myself to be more self-confident, the teacher told us to take a cardboard sheet draw a circle on it, and then slice up the circle like a pie. In each slice we were to add what was important to us. Some slices were bigger than others, as they were more important. Every week, we had to do something for ourselves – that we could say, yeah! It does feel awkward at the beginning.
Self-esteem is like a hungry beast: you must continually feed it these morsels to keep its hunger at bay! And when it is not satisfied it usually turns to the opposite of confidence – arrogance. Be careful on the self-talk you are giving.
I have a saying, if someone was being unkind to a friend I would say “Quit beating up on my friend.” This stops or disrupts the patterns of your self-talk. If you have trouble working with people at work, stop and checkin with yourself, you are contributing or not to the situation at hand.
Are you empathetic towards yourself and other people?
Many Leaders are talking the talk, but failing to walk the walk.. This is called the empathic gap. The stats that our leaders think this is improving, it’s not, and if it’s not corrected then the morale and employee performance declines.
What part of empathy do you play? Do you take the time for someone else, to ask them questions in how they are feeling, or engage in a conversation with people. Whether it’s yourself, friends, family or co-workers.. it’s important that we take responsibility for ourselves and talk the walk.
How can you be more empathic and create more self-confidence for yourself.
- Give yourself rest, self-compassion
- Get professional help if you have some deep work to do
- Meditate, read a book
- Help someone else at work
- Listen to other people without judgement
- Ask for help if you need some flexibility at work
- Put aside money for a ‘Pin bag,” it’s a stash of mad money so you can buy yourself something special
- Be nice to yourself – buy yourself some flowers or a good meal
- If you aren’t getting any empathy from anyone -give it to yourself
- Reach out to someone to have a coffee – get to know them
- Be strong in your self-talk – tell yourself how wonderful you are, or what a great person you are
- Volunteer – your presence will make such a difference for yourself and others
Pause, reflect, connect and listen..
Watch as Ivan shares stories about Caring for other people. He told me, that one day his Rabbi was in a meeting, he shared a kind story that the energy in the room lifted up. Kindness is rubbing off.
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